Category Archives: Uncategorized

Simon Cowell’s Strange New Wheels

Taking a break from his normal behavior of buying insanely expensive cars, but not taking a break from his deplorable habit of wasting large sums of money just because he’s having a bad week, Simon Cowell bought himself a Carver recently. The American Idol and X Factor star has recently been the subject of a tell-all book that paints a less than flattering picture of the music mogul, and to take his mind off of his problems he’s purchased the out-of-production three-wheeled dynamo for around $40 thousand. The Carver, which has an automatic balancing technology that reportedly makes it the most fun car ever, is a modest purchase for a man of his wealth, but it’s still a waste when you consider how many other rides Cowell has in his garage. The odds of him driving around in it in everyday life are slim to none, and the odds of him having time to play with it more than once every few months are just as low; so basically Simon Cowell just wasted a normal person’s yearly salary because someone hurt his feelings.

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Kate Hudson And Matt Bellamy Have A Day Out In Their Thunderbird

With their lack of attention seeking, adorable baby, and separate but strong careers, Kate Hudson and Matt Bellamy are quickly becoming one of entertainment’s least annoying power-couples; their latest escapade only strengthened this image. The two were recently spotted taking a break from their busy schedules of making terrible rom-coms like Something Borrowed and A Little Bit of Heaven, and making hipster-friendly music like “Knights of Cydonia” (respectively) to cruise around in their classic Thuderbird. It’s a really sweet ride that looks great in this setting. It seems like the car was meant to be used by young lovers who want nothing more than to look cool while being in love. We’re fully aware of how sappy that last comment was, but we don’t care; that car is a classic romance-mobile and there’s nothing more “Hollywood romance” than a rock star and a starlet cruising around in a convertible. For once, we’re proud to be sappy…okay, we’re not  proud, but we’re significantly less ashamed than usual.

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Olivier Martinez’s Aston Martin

French actor Olivier Martinez, star of Dark Tide and Unfaithful (Spoiler Alert: It has Richard Gere in it!) is a part of the small sect of Hollywood stars that refuses to drive around in anything new, and he’s definitely got one of the coolest classics in the group. Famous for his charm (which has netted him relationships with Kylie Minogue, Rosey Huntington-Whitely, and Halle Berry), the bad guy from S.W.A.T. (he was the one that offered “One-hun-jed-mee-leeon doe-lars” for his freedom) smoothes around the streets in a mint-condition black Aston Martin V8 Vantage Volante. It’s a really nice car, and worth the six-figures he spent on it, if just for how much cooler it makes him look.

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Ben Affleck, His Lexus, His Dogs, and His Burger

Man, Ben Affleck really gets the most out of his vehicles. The Town, Argo, and Armageddon star uses his brand new Lexus LS Hybrid to transport around his little Jennifer Garner anchored family of course, but that’s not all folks. He also uses to to get tickets, hang out with dogs, and eat burgers; the guy really knows how to use his ride, and it’s quite a ride he has. The Lexus LS Hybrid is both good for the enviroment, and ultra fancy; it cost him well over $100 thousand, and is most likely fully loaded. It’s a great car for him because it says “I’m ridiculously rich, but I still love my family and the earth”, it’s like something a really rich character from Avatar (did people forget about that steaminf pile yet?) would drive, but better, because Ben Affleck drives it and he directed Gone Baby, Gone, and that’s a way better movie than Avatar. By the way folks, bonus points to whoever can photoshop Affleck eating the burger with the dogs while getting the ticket.

 

 

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Captain America’s Motorcycle!

Even superheroes need a ride sometimes. For every Superman that can fly and every Spiderman that can swing, there’s a Batman that need a mobile. So in honor of America’s birthday (July 4th! Ya big dummy); today we give recognition to Captain America’s motorcycles. Throughout his run in the comics and on screen, the original Avenger has travelled around in everything from a van to a jet, but he always ended up on an old Harley when it was all said and done. Sometimes it was painted Red, White, and Blue, and sometimes it was just a plain old military bike, but it was always two wheels, and it was always ready to kick Nazi ass. It’s pretty appropriate when you think about it; nothing says brash American kick-assitude like a dude dressed like a giant flag riding a big loud motorcycle into battle. So light a sparkler, play some rock and roll, and kiss a bald eagle as you throw up a big salute to the Captain and his steel horse!! (Cue up sick Bon Jovi “Dead or Alive”/ Star Spangled Banner mash-up)

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Matt Damon’s Tesla Roadster

Matt Damon has played every role imaginable. He’s played a murderer (The Talented Mr. Ripley), a gambler (Rounders), a cowboy (True Grit), a super spy (The Bourne Identity) and even a nerdy loser (The Informant!), but he started playing a new role a few years back: planeteer. Damon joined other eco-friendly celebrities when he started purchasing hybrid cars, most notably his Baby-Blue Tesla Roadster. The sleek gas/electric coupe, which is actually about to cease production soon, gets over 120 mpg while still looking like a sports car, and while it’s not great off the line, Damon says it’s 30-60mph pick-up is awesome. Unlike a lot of other celebrities though, Damon seems to have been a little more low key in his support of eco-friendly vehicles, opting to just “shut up and drive” as it were and keep his car choice off the talk show circuit and inside the auto pages.

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